Worried about a friend or flatmate?

Worried about a friend, classmate or someone in your shared flat? Information below will help with;

Advice on what you can do
Practical information to pass on to your friend
Support to help you deal with your own emotions

What's causing you to worry?

You may be worried about your friend’s physical, emotional or mental health.

Maybe you are worried because your friend has told you directly that they are experiencing difficulties?

Maybe your concern is a result of something you have noticed?

You might have become aware of;

Changes in your friend’s appearance (i.e. significant weight loss/gain, decline in personal hygiene)
Changes to your friend’s mood and/or behaviour (i.e. they’ve become sad and withdrawn, or angry and aggressive)
You may have noticed that your friend’s alcohol or drug taking is or has become excessive
Other people might have mentioned their worries about this person to you

These are just a few of the reasons that you may be worried about a friend or flatmate.

Keep reading to get some practice advice on what you can do to help.

What can you do if you are worried?

Thinking about how to approach a friend, flatmate or classmate who is experiencing difficulties can be daunting, but by following the steps below you can share your concern in a caring and gentle way.

Step 1: Be straightforward and honest - tell your friend that you are worried about them, and that you would like to help them if you can.

Step 2: Be prepared to listen – make time to listen to how your friend’s experiences have made them feel, and try to show them understanding and compassion.

Step 3: Express concern - but remember you're not their therapist! There are limits on what you can offer as a friend. Make clear to them what you can do (listen and recommend sources of support) and what you can’t do (solve all their problems).

Step 4: Encourage your friend to get help – remind them that they’re probably not alone in feeling the way that they do. Lots of students struggle while they’re at University. That’s why GCU has a dedicated counselling service staffed by professional counsellors who are trained to work with a wide range of issues.

Step 5: Support yourself – remember to look after your own wellbeing during this time. Recognise if it becomes difficult for you and make time to relax, do things for fun and spend time with others. You may find that talking it through with someone else (while keeping your friend’s confidentiality where appropriate) can help ease the strain.

Sources of support

If you are worried about a student who is living in Caledonian Court you may decide to speak to a member of staff in the Accommodation Office or a Residence Assistant.

Staff in the accommodation office are on hand to offer a wide variety of support. They also have good links with other sources of support across the university. If your friend is having trouble settling in, or has issues with their flatmates then accommodation staff may be able to offer practical advice. You can also speak with accommodation staff about other concerns you have about your friend or flatmate and they will be able to offer advice or signpost appropriate support.

You can also encourage your friend or flatmate to talk to a Residence Assistant. Residence Assistants are specially designated students (typically 3^rd or 4^th years or post-graduate students) who live in Caledonian Court. Residence assistants are trained to offer advice about the types of support available at GCU. If your friend or flatmate lives in Caledonian Court they will be able to contact the Residential Assistants by email or by phone (details given to residents upon arrival). The Residential Assistants also attend the social space each evening between 6.00pm and 10pm where they will be able to listen to your concerns and offer advice.

Other sources of specialist advice and support include:

V.I.S.A who provide advice on a range of issues including visas and welfare issues faced by international students
Student Funding Team who provide advice on student funding and administer a range of funds for students facing financial hardship
Academic staff are also on hand for you to talk to. If you have concerns about a friend or classmate you can speak to your lecturer or class tutor. Your lecturer/tutor will deal with this information in a discrete manner, and will be well placed to let you know where to find the most appropriate support for your friend.

What if I have immediate concerns?

In an immediate situation it is important to think about your safety and the safety of others.

If you feel safe to do so;

Be straightforward, explain to your friend that you are going to try and help
If your friend continues to behave in a way that threatens their own safety or others it may be that you decide to contact university security or emergency services.
If you are on campus or Caledonian Court ask a member of staff to help you to call security and arrange for an ambulance.
If you are off campus call NHS 24 and take advice from there

On Campus: University security 0141 273 3787

Off Campus: NHS 24 08454 242424